Nov. 8, 2025

Gaslighting Isn’t Romantic, It’s A Plot with Shiva Negar and Bela Behar

Gaslighting Isn’t Romantic, It’s A Plot with Shiva Negar and Bela Behar

Send us a text What if a thriller could do more than raise your pulse—what if it could help you see the early signs of harm and chart a path back to yourself? We sit with writer-producer Bella Bahar and actress Shiva Nagar to explore Deadly Vow, a film that starts with romance, swerves into danger, and refuses to look away from the realities of domestic abuse. The conversation moves from Cannes panels to late-night calls between collaborators, revealing how a story powered by empathy becomes ...

Send us a text

What if a thriller could do more than raise your pulse—what if it could help you see the early signs of harm and chart a path back to yourself? We sit with writer-producer Bella Bahar and actress Shiva Nagar to explore Deadly Vow, a film that starts with romance, swerves into danger, and refuses to look away from the realities of domestic abuse. The conversation moves from Cannes panels to late-night calls between collaborators, revealing how a story powered by empathy becomes a movement for awareness, healing, and change.

Shiva brings us inside her character’s world, honoring the emotional truth of someone who once chose love and family before facing control, isolation, gaslighting, and escalating threats. Bella shares why she left a medical career to produce a project rooted in real experiences, drawing on years of advocacy through Paradise Charity and a deep belief that cinema can connect audiences to the hard-to-name patterns many endure in silence. Together, we talk about how independent film actually gets made—finding investors at markets, delivering to festivals and distributors, and protecting sensitive material—while keeping the mission front and center.

At the core is sisterhood: women sharing knowledge instead of competing for the spotlight, translating industry jargon, showing up to meetings, and holding space when the work gets heavy. We discuss the first steps for someone living in fear, the importance of recognizing warning signs early, and what it means to break the cycle for children who learn what “normal” looks like at home. You’ll hear why storytelling creates empathy, how validation can be a catalyst for healing, and the simple, fierce reminder: you are not what happened to you; you are what you rise from.

Deadly Vow arrives November 14. Join us to learn the signs, support survivors, and back a film made with courage and care. If this conversation moved you, subscribe, share it with a friend, and leave a review—your voice helps more listeners find resources and hope.

Thanks for listening! Follow us on X, Instagram and Facebook and on the podcast's official site www.theheartofshowbusiness.com

00:00 - Welcome And Mission Of The Show

01:11 - Introducing Guests And Deadly Vow

02:34 - Portraying Abuse From Love To Danger

05:01 - Release Details And Audience Resonance

05:36 - Producing From Purpose And Lived Stories

08:16 - Funding, Festivals, And Delivery Hurdles

09:23 - Real Sisterhood On And Off Set

12:01 - Women Lifting Women Amid Industry Pressures

14:34 - A Message To Women Living In Fear

17:03 - How Storytelling Drives Healing And Awareness

19:45 - Worth, Breaking Cycles, And First Steps

22:32 - Final Encouragements, Resources, And CTAs

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Welcome to the Heart of Show Business.

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I am your host, Alexia Melocchi.

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I believe in great storytelling and that every successful artist has a deep desire to express something from the heart to create a ripple effect in our society.

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Emotion and entertainment are closely tied together.

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My guests and I want to give you insider access to how the film, television and music industry works.

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We will cover Dreams Come True, The Roads Travel, Journey Beginnings, and a lot of insight and inspiration in between.

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I am a successful film and television entrepreneur who came to America as a teenager to pursue my show business dreams.

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Are you ready for some unfiltered real talk with entertainment visionaries from all over the world?

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Then let's throw sound and action.

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Welcome to the Heart of Show Business, where we dive into the stories behind the storytellers and the power of entertainment to create empathy, connection, and change.

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Today I'm joined by two extraordinary women who I actually had the pleasure also of hanging out with in this Cannes Festival because I was a panelist for a talk about women in entertainment, and we spoke in length about this movie, but clearly you were not in Cannes.

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So now you get a second chance to hear this incredible story.

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I have with me writer-producer Bella Bahar and actress Shiva Nagar to discuss their upcoming film, Deadly Val.

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This movie is not a thriller.

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It is a thriller, but it's so much more than that.

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It's a mirror that we hold up to one of society's most painful truths, which is domestic abuse.

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So the silence around it and also the courage that it takes to break free.

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Also, though, what I love about this is that all this, all the people, or at least a lot of the people in this movie, were women.

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And so we're shining here the principle of sisterhood, women lifting each other on screen and off.

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And uh, so now we're just gonna explore how this project became a cinematic journey and a movement of empowerment.

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Welcome to my show, ladies.

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Thank you for having me.

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Thank you.

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It's so good to have you.

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Not Jet Lack, we're all fresh and dewy and uh bushy and tailed or whatever it's called, that thing.

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So Shiva, you obviously the lead actress and things, so I wanted to get to you um and say you have a character that experiences the unraveling of what it looks like a perfect relationship.

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Um, how did you prepare emotionally to show the shift from fear to strength?

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Wow.

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Um my main goal was to um honor the emotional truth of women who have gone through this.

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It was really important for me to realize the the weight of that, you know.

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Um we all have similar experiences, but this is um this story is extraordinary uh and it's um not uh very similar to a lot of domestic violence cases, it's very unique in its own way as well.

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So I really wanted to uh take in all that and the heaviness of that.

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So I sort of backtracked a little bit um as much as I could uh into uh the history of the relationship and how things were amazing at one point, you know.

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Uh you fall in love with someone, you decide to marry someone, everything is, you know, sunshine and rainbows to a point where you commit to have kids together, and you know, so having to go through all that and being so happy and married, and and and what sort of starts in like a nuclear family and like a perfect relationship, and for it to shift 180 degrees, you know, to uh someone not wanting the other person to be alive, you know.

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So it's it's uh um I wanted to make sure that I take in all those complications and those emotional nuances of this character to, you know, realize that this is someone that I was in love with, and now he wants me dead, you know, at the mother of his children.

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So I uh had to take all that in and not just stay in the present, but make sure that the character has all the memories and all the good things and everything that happened in the past, um, and how that affects her presence and her emotional presence, basically.

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That is fantastic, and I have to say, I'm sure everybody who's gonna be watching the movie, which by the way, it's coming out November 11th, if I'm not wrong.

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Or November 14th.

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Oh, November 14th is coming uh everywhere.

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So please make sure to check it out.

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I think a lot of women are going to identify in this.

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I mean, obviously, Shiva, you clearly did.

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I mean, we've all had a little um puppy of uh personal relationship experiences, some better, some worse.

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And so I think we all relate to it on a greater or smaller level.

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But Bella, I know that, and again, you're you're sort of a new producer, no offense, but you are a new producer.

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But obviously, you went out and you made this movie happen, which is so commendable in today's very challenging landscape.

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So I wanted to ask you, uh it is said, rumor has it, that the film is born from certain real stories.

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So was there a moment when you obviously got hold of the material or when it got completed as a script, and you said, This is the time to tell this, and this is the time we need to tell the story now?

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Yes, as you mentioned, everyone can kind of I mean, not I mean 95% of the people probably can probably relate to this story in one way or another, you know.

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It's it touches based on domestic violence, but also untreated childhood traumas, PTSD, untreated alcoholism, uh, healing, forgiveness, a lot of different topics.

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So um, I have a self-funded charity for um victims of abuse uh since 2013 is called Paradise Charity.

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So I've seen a lot of uh heroes that have survived domestic violence, and um, it's just a story that needs to be told.

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And um, I think telling the story through a cinema, bringing awareness through the cinema is a very strong way of um connecting with people and making a difference.

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So that's when when I saw the story, I said I have to make it happen one way or another.

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And um uh it's not I'm I'm in my background is in medical, I'm uh I was a new producer, uh, but I also like challenging businesses.

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I I get bored if if things are easy, so this was extremely challenging, but also it was um very rewarding and uh in evolving and uh meeting a lot of new people and learning a lot of new things.

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Um, and right now you're dealing with delivery, which is which is my first time actually handling film delivery, and oh my god, oh my god, it is so such a learning curve, so much it is, yeah.

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It's a great festivals, you know.

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We have to deliver to festivals and we have to deliver to distribution, and everything is coming up.

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We got into four or five festivals, thank god we have to deliver to all of them at the same time.

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We have to deliver to domestic, international, so it is a lot of work, but I we're enjoying it, we're learning every day.

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So you know it's very courageous of what you've done because again, coming from the medical field, I think you told me when we're having a beautiful dinner in Cannes that you just bought a badge and you go went to a film market and you said, I'm gonna find the financiers.

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And oh my gosh, sometimes those rookie things actually do work because I will always say to somebody, don't go to a market unless you are prepared, and don't go unless you have a package.

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And then here you are uh talking up the movie and finding the investors and uh you know, shout out to some of the men too, by the way, that the back the film, it wasn't just all women.

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Um obviously they did play a pivotal role, but so that's very commendable that you go to a I think the American film market, and here you are, you know, hanging out in Cannes and introducing it to the press and the media.

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And and it just goes into one of the things that the one of my favorite things about the film creation is that showing the women are standing shoulder to shoulder.

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Um, I loved experiencing that with you ladies, even on the panel.

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You were so supportive of one another.

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Nobody was trying to have like the highlight or be in the spotlight.

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You were all together united with this message.

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Uh, I want to ask you, both of you, if you like, to talk about it.

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Um, what did that look like behind the scenes while you were filming?

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Um, I was actually gonna say I'm I'm so proud of Bella for what she's done because, like you said, thank you.

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I obviously know, like I've been in this business for a long time, so I know how difficult it is, I know how complicated it is.

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And a lot of people do the talk, you know, but to take action and actually get things done, it's it's hard, it's really hard, especially if you uh are new to the industry and and you know so uh I applaud you for that, honestly.

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Thank you.

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I couldn't have done it without Shiva, Shiva Shore Jun and Luna, like they really hold my hand, like I could not couldn't have done it without them.

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Yeah, like sometimes I ask Shiva Jun, what's what does this mean?

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Can you come to the PR meeting?

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Can you explain?

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Because the worlds like all sound like like a foreign language for me, like because I'm not familiar with the terms.

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Yeah, and that's the whole supporting thing, like you said, because I uh when I talked when I first met Bella and the and we talked about the story, it was you know, it was heart-to-heart conversation, really.

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And and I wanted to not just, you know, obviously play the character, but I just wanted to be a part of telling the story in every way possible and to help deliver um an impactful story on the big screen for people to really um you know be resonate uh and uh be impacted by it and and to inspire people.

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So um I wanted to be part of it and support her and um and everyone else who was passionate.

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And honestly, that's how we all came together because um we sort of filled all the the holes, you know.

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We all brought our own expertise and and um like she brought her business background, and of course I brought in all my experience from this industry and all the ups and downs and everything I've gone through and and Shoraju in the same way.

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So we sort of like all contributed to uh make this come to life, and that's the beauty of it to see the the fruits of your efforts.

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Yes, and we're excited to see the fruits November 14th.

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Oh, we allow I'm I'm waiting for my next screening invitation because I didn't make the up, so I can't wait to see you both.

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And you know, it's interesting because this whole women supporting women, it almost sounds like a hashtag.

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Everybody's using it on Instagram and whatever, women and Pyron and everything.

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Shiva, you also have a podcast, so you you know what that's like.

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Um, and but we also know that there is competition sometimes, and women can be very mean to one another as well.

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There is also the other side of it.

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So I would love to, and and that can eclipse also the collaboration, not in this movie clearly, but in Hollywood in general.

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So would any of you want to recall a moment where there was a woman in your life that lifted you up in a moment that you doubted yourself?

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And what was that?

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Was that a word that was said?

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Was it a funkal, something that they did, they hugged you, they did something that would change the trajectory of the way that you um present yourself to the world as a woman?

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Yeah.

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Um I'm like, do you want to start or should I?

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Um actresses first.

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The first thing I always obviously, the first person I think about is my mom, because my mom is my hero, but um, and and she's always there for me.

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But to be honest, uh when it c when it's related to this industry, I have to mention Shori Jun because I did another movie with uh with Shorijun and um years ago, and obviously she's been a great friend and a mentor since then.

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But I have made a a couple phone calls, at least that I can recall, to Shori Jun when I was literally on the verge of a nervous breakdown uh related to this industry, and I just needed some advice and I needed some guidance as to what I should do, what's the next move, because she's been obviously doing this much longer than I have.

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And so I I I literally called her crying, like on the phone, and just you know, and and you know, she listened and she just talking to her, and some of the things she said, it just calmed me down.

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So I have to actually say um it was very um impactful, and it had a very positive effect on me to be able to vent to somebody who gets it, you know, who gets the business and who gets all the ups and downs and all the doors that you have to keep knocking on.

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And um so kudos to her.

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I'm gonna have to mention her for for that for sure, because she's been a great friend and a and a mentor to me over the years.

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Wow, that's wonderful.

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Well, Bella, maybe I can ask you another question because I think you know, just to get them.

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Um, and I think Shiva pretty much talked about it.

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But again, you are an outspoken advocate for women's rights globally, um, as obviously is Shiva in her own way and Shore.

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Is there one truth that you wish every woman living in fear could hold on to right now?

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Because there is a lot of women who might be in a relationship that feels wrong, but they do not know why.

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So, what's the one truth that you wish every woman that is living in fear could hold on to right now?

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Yeah, that's uh that's a good question.

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Um, I just want everyone to know.

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I mean, Daria's story, um, inspired on true story, it's uh it's an extreme form of domestic violence.

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Um and um if Daria was able to survive and come out of it and break the cycle of trauma for herself and for her children, anyone can come out of it.

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I know it's not easy, it could be difficult, it could be uh you think of family, kids, you know, um, but um uh really like domestic violence when you're in that type of relationship, 95% of the time everything is so beautiful, but that 5% could be extremely dangerous and life-threatening.

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So if um you have to think of your own life, your children's life, and um if um you have to, there's a lot of help out there, try to get the help that you need, and there is a lot of help and planning.

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If you don't see things moving to the right path, there is no therapy, no healing, no one wants to take a step, then you have to think of a backup plan to save your own life, your children's life, break the cycle.

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There is always you can always overcome, you can always heal, it takes time, but you can always heal and um and survive this and live again and inspire others.

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It just takes time.

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It's not it's not easy, but there is you have to take the first step and break that cycle.

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Otherwise, it happens over and over again.

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Yeah, no, that is so true.

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And as as Shiva also mentioned, you know, when we're talking about the movie, we're experiencing in real time the gaslighting, the isolation, the manipulation, the controlling behavior, the financial uh manipulation.

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And then, you know, to any woman who's listening, you know, even in this podcast and he feels trapped, that you know, you need to know that you're not invisible, you're not alone.

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There are women who walk through fire and can help guide you.

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Obviously, you know, some of these women are present here in this room.

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Uh, and also, you know, I I like that we we talk about pain, but we also talk about the other side, which is healing, right?

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So, how can a movie like Deadly Vow, which obviously starts out as a thriller, uh, become part of that healing process for both survivors and society?

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Both of you.

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Sure.

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Um I mean, uh, like you were saying, uh, abuse doesn't start with violence necessarily either, right?

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So um, and all those little signs are are important to notice.

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And we did we definitely want this film to help women recognize the early warning signs, uh, because you know, awareness uh uh can save lives.

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It really can.

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So um and I always say storytelling creates empathy, right?

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It it lets people see what they might not have uh words for yet, or um, or for survivors.

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It can it can be validating to see the their experience reflected truthfully without judgment, and um for others it can open their eyes and hearts.

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Um I think it gives the pain a purpose.

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Um and that I guess that silence turns into connection in a way, and and um and that's what I love about uh filmmaking because it that's what it heals.

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It can heal while it educates at the same time, and that's what I love about storytelling.

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Yeah, I love that.

00:19:09.279 --> 00:19:12.319
Um yeah, I I think yeah, for everyone is kind of different.

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Maybe you can connect with a spiritual person that helps you um walk through your healing journey.

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Maybe it's a group of friends, maybe it's a foundation, maybe it's it's some your friends, maybe as Shiva Jun said, is making a movie, writing a book, you know.

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Everyone's healing is kind of different, but you have to, there's many ways, you know.

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You have to see what helps you um heal and overcome and be happy again and kind of find your own journey to healing.

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It could be long, it could be lonely, but um, but you can you can go through it and you can overcome and be happy.

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Um, another way that I for me it has helped is inspiring others or charity work.

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That also helps a lot with healing.

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Yeah, yeah.

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I would say that whatever it is that you can do that helps you stand out in the light instead of living in darkness, yeah, that would be the thing that you need to do.

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Like you said, whether it is focus on your children, your pets, some creative outlet, reach out to someone.

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Um, and I know this is gonna sound very woo-woo, but this is kind of like the last question.

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And uh, before we wrap up, I would love a sentence from both of you on what do you want every woman listening to remember about her worth?

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Is there a sentence that you would like to give each of you just on the sense of having worth as a woman?

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I mean, it might be a little more than a sentence.

00:20:51.119 --> 00:20:52.559
Yes, you can do it longer.

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I know that you rush the time, but feel free to make it longer.

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I mean, honestly, it's just that uh you you matter.

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I'm trying not to get emotional, but uh your goals, your dreams, they're valid no matter where you come from.

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And um you are not what happened to you.

00:21:14.640 --> 00:21:19.039
Um you are what you choose to rise from.

00:21:19.680 --> 00:21:20.880
That's what I was saying.

00:21:21.839 --> 00:21:22.720
That's beautiful.

00:21:23.039 --> 00:21:25.119
That's a hashtag moment, people.

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Hashtag you are not what happened to you or what you choose to do.

00:21:29.039 --> 00:21:30.160
I love that.

00:21:30.319 --> 00:21:31.039
I love that.

00:21:31.200 --> 00:21:33.279
Yes, Bella, what about you?

00:21:33.599 --> 00:21:40.559
So mine is a little bit longer than a sentence, but we're women, we like to talk, we're gonna say right.

00:21:41.359 --> 00:21:53.519
Sometimes we think of we're staying in a relationship because of our children, but it's really putting the children on a lot more um pressure and PTSD and traumatizing.

00:21:53.680 --> 00:22:00.000
So it's really breaking the cycle frees up generation of pain, you know.

00:22:00.640 --> 00:22:06.160
So it's really breaking that cycle is important, healing yourself and healing your children.

00:22:06.720 --> 00:22:13.599
Um, it's it's very important, otherwise, they might end up in a relationship just like yours and they feel it's normal.

00:22:14.240 --> 00:22:18.960
Um, so it's important to break that cycle and heal and have everyone heal.

00:22:19.039 --> 00:22:22.319
The children need to heal, the couple need to heal.

00:22:23.200 --> 00:22:24.559
So that's very important.

00:22:24.720 --> 00:22:26.640
Yeah, they say take that first step, right?

00:22:26.720 --> 00:22:30.400
You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take that first step.

00:22:30.640 --> 00:22:34.960
I have to thank you, ladies, for your courage and for your artistry.

00:22:35.200 --> 00:22:40.880
Uh, for everyone listening, you know, Deadly Vow is not just a film, but it is a wake-up call.

00:22:40.960 --> 00:22:45.680
And it's a reminder that we women, when we come together, we can become unstoppable.

00:22:45.759 --> 00:22:49.839
And also that there are men who care about us and they want us to be unstoppable.

00:22:50.079 --> 00:22:57.359
So if you or someone you know needs help, please do reach out to your domestic, local domestic abuse hotline.

00:22:57.839 --> 00:23:01.440
Uh, thank you for coming into the heart of show business.

00:23:01.599 --> 00:23:05.200
Everybody, watch and support the movie and spread the word.

00:23:05.359 --> 00:23:11.119
We need stories like this one, we need human stories, we need stories of hope and resilience.

00:23:11.359 --> 00:23:15.680
And uh as always, thank you for tuning into the heart of show business.

00:23:16.079 --> 00:23:23.440
Uh, women tell stories that matter, and we just don't get to change Hollywood, we get to change lives.

00:23:23.599 --> 00:23:32.240
And if you enjoyed this podcast show, please subscribe, rate, review, review the movie, of course, as well.

00:23:32.480 --> 00:23:33.440
And thank you for watching.

00:23:33.599 --> 00:23:59.839
I do want to mention um uh for announcements and future posts, uh, we do have a website, deadlyvows.com, and we also have an Instagram page, DeadlyVowsTheMovie, and people can get all the latest updates on the website and on Instagram for the yes, that's great, and also I'll be dropping Shiva's podcast because we podcasters like to support one another.

00:24:00.079 --> 00:24:04.640
So I'll also drop her because she's like me, she's doing it for the love, I'm sure.

00:24:04.880 --> 00:24:08.400
So we all gotta, you know, uplift and support one another.

00:24:08.559 --> 00:24:10.640
So thank you, ladies, for your time.

00:24:10.960 --> 00:24:15.519
And uh, this is the Heart of Show Business, over and out.

00:24:16.319 --> 00:24:21.519
Thank you for listening to this week's episode of The Heart of Show Business.

00:24:21.759 --> 00:24:24.640
If you enjoyed it, please share it with a friend.

00:24:24.799 --> 00:24:30.240
You can also subscribe, rate, and review the show on your favorite podcast player.

00:24:30.400 --> 00:24:38.880
If you have any questions or comments or feedback for us, you can reach me directly at theheartofshowbusiness.com.